From: TECRUS::WEISENBACH "Let's lynch the landlord! 12-Sep-1991 2026" 12-SEP-1991 20:54:42.14 To: @PIG.DIS CC: Subj: Pig Roast Reminder! Another quick reminder about the upcoming Pig Roast! Pay close attention because the day is coming upon us swiftly! So... *********************************************************************** WHAT: PIG ROAST '91 ==> Oktoberfest! WHO: You, friends, family. WHEN: October 5th! == Oktoberfest! WHERE: Lynne and Stevee McCormick's house 220 Mechanic Street, Upton (directions will come later) HOW: Simple. RSVP when told to, show up as expected, and bring a side-dish to share! *********************************************************************** Now, were you paying close attention? If you were paying as close attention as an opportunity to attend a Pig Roast warrants, you noticed that Lynne McCormick's name is definitely spelled with an "E" at the end of it instead of the way I originally spelled it, as Lynn. SHE certainly noticed it. In fact, in her crisp little reminder I could almost hear the low muttering tones she uses when she is mostly miffed and mulling manslaughter. Not one to cross, that LynnE. Unless you enjoy the alternating doleful and peeved looks you will receive. And finally, note that Stevee's name also requires a extra, redundant, silent "E". Now what were the chances that I would forget both? But on to other matters. The Pig Roast is only some three weeks away, meaning it is time to RSVP! Put aside those old weekend plans, scalp those tickets to Canobie Lake, and reply posthaste! Your reply is needed to get that most vital element, the Pig. I need to know how many you will be bringing, and how many will be consuming the manna-called-pork. You could also further sub-divide and pigeon-hole the people attending into other categories of your choice, but I will only be counting the people attending and the people planning on consuming the centerpiece of the event. Follow that? Nevermind, just RSVP. The Pig Roast location is a lovely, fresh home in the woods. Directions to Upton will coming soon. An important side note: Do you know what poison ivy looks like. You might want to look it up in the encyclopedia as a refresher... Remember, this is not just a Pig Roast, this is a Pig Roast - Oktoberfest! This is a fine German tradition, featuring all the ingredients that tend to make the leaders of Germany get a little too rambunctious from war to war, namely a great deal of beer and the slow-roasted flesh of a young swine. Or as they call it in Germany, slowenroastenyoongswinehund. Fortunately for the world, those rowdy German leaders also ate a lot of sauerkraut, which tends to put a damper on just about everything. Anyway, to authentically appreciate this event, the men should wear leather shorts, the women should wear dresses cut low in the front (and push-up bras), and everyone should have a two liter-sized beer mug. The dress codes won't be that strict, but do bring a mug. If you have a roll of duct tape (who in their right mind doesn't?) but no mug, try cutting the top off a 2 liter bottle of Coke and taping a handle to it. Use LOTS of tape to attach the handle! Accidents with beer will not be permitted. Also, be careful with the sharp plastic on the brim... Did I mention you should RSVP? I got a little side-tracked there. This year the host list is a little longer than usual for a number of reasons and outright enthusiasm. So to keep them straight, here's a run-down of the hosts. Name/Title Notes ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Stevee McCormick While rather mundane sounding, Co-homeowner is just short "Co-Homeowner" of deity. Those who bear this title are good, generous people who must be thanked, appreciated, and reassured as often as possible. Stevee deserves extra thanks for being a super-secret, inside negotiator. Lynne McCormick The "hostess with the most-ess" as they say. Lynne has "Co-Homeowner" volunteered to be in charge of name tags and worrying. Two big jobs for a novice Roaster-Hoster! Make sure to find her and give her a huge, Life-sprung hug... Chuck Benz "Roaster Emeritus" The original New England Roaster! Chuck's in charge of equipment, procurement, and scheduling. The kind of things that make a Pig Roast go. He'll never grow up. Alan Cave Alan earns his title for being the first to ask "So when is "Prime Motivator" the next Pig Roast, anyway?" Always on top of things... Lew Lahr Lew is the Official Emergency Response Team of the Fall '91 "Official ERT" Pig Roast. He'll be the one in the bright yellow radiation suit. If you need him, just chant "Lew! Lew! Lew!" Blaine Stackhouse At first, this sounds like a dubious honor. But Blaine was "Clean-up King" instrumental in winning over the co-homeowners, mostly by promising to coordinate the clean-up. Now that's real spirit and dedication. So I won't call him "Biff." Chris Mayer A novice Roaster and easily conned, Chris is throwing in "Sixties-retro" his lot with the hosts. Needs a hair-cut, but so do I. Bob That's me. My main occupation is keeping the list of "List Maintainer" invitees and putting out the invites. I also help badger co-homeowners into submission... Remember, hosts have priority in the keg line! And always remember, October 5th is Oktoberfest!