From: BINKLY::WEISENBACH "I ain't drunk, I'm just drinking. 27-Sep-1989 0810" 27-SEP-1989 08:15:00.47 To: @PIG.DIS CC: Subj: Pig directions again! Is anyone gettimg these? My node's been screwed up. Announcing... the long awaited VAX 9000! No, wait, I meant to say that these are the desperately needed Directions to the Pig Roast. The following are also directions to Lew's home, so all you adoring fans out there take note. The Pig Roast will be at #26 Fairview Drive, Southboro MA. The phone number is 508-460-8024. Feel free to call at any time, even after the pig roast. Lew loves to answer the phone, even very late at night, since it reminds him of his days as an R.A. at U.C. So call! Especially if you're the kind of sweet young thing that Lew needs so desperately to balance his life. Wait a second, maybe you should call me instead... IMPORTANT NEW INFORMATION: The party officially starts around 3:00pm, with the Monster Pig being neatly torn to shreds at 5-6pm. Since we'll be there all night, feel free to come early and check it out and be assigned errands to run. The earliest you can show up would be midnight on Friday. How to get to Lew's place: ** Route #1 Take Rt.85 south past Rt.9, crossing over the recently refurbished bridge. Make a right onto Mt. Vickery, which is the first right after AAA trucking on the left. Follow this paved, meandering cow path through the woods for a half a mile. The road ends at a T intersection, marked only by a large tree appearing before you. Turn left at the T, onto Middle road. Follow Middle road for a short while, turning right at the first stop sign. Now you're on Parkerville street. Take the first paved left onto Fairview, ignoring the dirt road that will be before Fairview. Follow Fairview up and around. The first right is Summit street, the second right is really Fairview veering to the right. Follow Fairview around that right, #26 is the first set of mailboxes after the corner. ** Route #2 From Rt.495 and points west, take Rt.9 east. Turn right onto Parkerville street from Rt.9. Parkerville is across from the Andrea restaurant that's on the left side of Rt.9, and right over the hill marked by a big yellow sign advertising "Eagle Leasing". A small yellow caution sign marks the turn. Once on Parkerville street, Fairview is the second right. The sign is totally obscured by trees though, so be careful. Follow Fairview up and around. The first right is Summit street, the second right is really Fairview veering to the right. Follow Fairview around that right, #26 is the first set of mailboxes after the corner. ** Here's some quick route notes: [1] Mt.Vickery is the road from Hell. It's narrow, winding, and lined with trees scarred with fender paint. There are numerous blind turns and tight curves. Please go closer to the 25mph speed limit than I was last night. Also, there are almost no traffic control signs marking the various corners, or who has the right of way. [2] Check out the big-bucks neighborhood Lew lives in. Mr.Upscale must be raking in the dough! No wonder they call him G.Q. Lew. [3] Here's a handy tip for navigating that area: never go down any street without street lights. It gets mighty dark out there. [4] Parking should be easy enough to find on the wide roads in the immediate vicinity. We promise to have some flashlights to help you relocate your car after it gets dark. [5] If you take route #2, check out the large stone walls that Parkerville street is funnelled through. Out of nowhere they lurch into view, graffiti coloring their granite flanks. What are they? Just the site of a small but bloody battle during the American Revolution. Going back in history a bit, a common tactic of the colonists was to sneak around in the dark and build forts surreptitiously. This happened numerous times in the battles around Boston, such as at Bunker Hill. Also common was that the great concern for silence, so important for sneaking, would lead to the hushing of scouts desperately trying to report that the colonial forces were building in the wrong spot. This happened at Bunker Hill, since they were really on Breed's Hill. In this case, the colonists were trying to build the fort on the hill that the Eagle Leasing place now stands upon, to attack the small British fort Ft.Lewsham. In the morning light the error was plain: the colonial and British forts stood no further than 30 feet apart! This amused neither side, and they proceeded to kill each other with great vigor, battling to a draw after they ran out of fresh people to hurt. Parkerville Street travels right between the two forts, which is how it got it's name. For extra credit, can you tell which fort was built by which side? [6] The plea for RSVP's worked wonders. A great number of people say they are coming, but will they dare to face the ultimate test? [7] Current estimates are that 80 to 90 partiers/pig eaters will be showing up. The porker's on order, and will weigh in at around 140 pounds. Please come hungry! And thirsty.